Fear of the Unknown

If you think the scariest part of writing a book is starting to write it, you’re wrong. To me, that’s actually the most fun part. Why, because it’s a place where I can escape and not be critized.  But now… Now it’s time to recieve reviews from foreign eyes. (Deep Bass) The Editor. When I first submitted the book to our editor, I was losing sleep asking myself so many questions.  What if she told me I was a horrible writer? What if she told me that I needed to scrap the entire manuscript (3 years worth of writing) and start over?  What if she said there was no hope and I should go back to twirling signs in front of H&R Block?  These thoughts continued to haunt me because I hated dressing up as the statue of liberty.  Yet, when I received the feedback from her- Christine-, she offered no words of condemnation but gave much praise.  But the scary part still wasn’t over.

Just today we sent the manuscript to three beta readers.  To date, this is the scariest part because their job is to only critize it. Good or Bad.  As I question myself as a writer and my ability to appeal to a mass audience, I realize that the unknown will always be scary.  I know I’m good writer but I know I can’t please everbody. It’s like getting an HIV test, knowing you haven’t been with anybody else but the unknown of “What If” is always terrifying. Uncertainty is what causes my nerves to be on edge.  Every step that we make with this book moving forward is another step into uncharted territories for us.


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